As a hermit and also someone who spends most of her days and nights looking after two young boys (and one husband), I can state with one-hundred-percent certainty that I am never prepared to run into someone from high school when I leave the house.
I’m wearing the same clothes I’ve had on for at least two days, there’s some kind of bodily fluid or food smear on it that isn’t mine, and let’s face it, if I liked you that much in high school we’d still be friends.
So, it’s pretty much always awful when you run into someone with a face you know you’re supposed to recognized and a name that’s lodged in waaay the back of your sleep-deprived brain.
Here are 14 people who totally, 100% nail that terrible moment on the head.
14. Except scarier because the ghosts are real.
haunted house : your hometown grocery store when everyone is home from holiday and you get stopped every minute by a different person and asked the same questions for an hour straight
— victoria (@victoriasnooks) October 23, 2018
13. If only it were always that easy.
Every conversation at the hometown bar tonight:
"Hey!! Long time no see – how are you?"
"Good! How's the fam? Working in the city now?"
"Well ima grab a drink real quick, let's catch up later?"
*doesn't catch up later*
— Rob Perez (@WorldWideWob) November 21, 2018
12. Small talk is the worst.
Met a woman at the airport from my hometown. Pretty crazy considering we’re so far from home. I lied when she asked where I’m from, obviously, cuz that would have lead to more small talk. But crazy nonetheless
— max homa (@maxhoma23) March 18, 2019
11. You don’t have to live this way.
i want to unfollow so many people from high school on instagram but am terrified of how it might be awkward if i ran into them at my hometown supermarket during the one week a year i visit and now i know why every astrology app says i avoid confrontation
— jenna wolf (@jennaawolf) September 7, 2019
10. Just say no.
When I'm in my hometown and a vague acquaintance from high school tries to make small talk with me at CVS https://t.co/qLhBkpnvqe
— Mariel Cariker (@marielcariker) August 15, 2017
9. One you lose as often as you win.
going to target in your hometown is just an anxiety fueled game of hide and seek with people you graduated with and don't wanna see
— spring child (@worstamericngrl) December 23, 2016
8. Did I get bigger or did this pole get smaller?
Going to my hometown grocery store trying to avoid everyone like pic.twitter.com/VnS1nQJH1o
— Lake Blanaghan (@BLanaghan) March 27, 2019
7. They never show those moments in Hallmark movies.
I like my hometown except no one ever leaves it so i’ve managed to run into almost every person I didn’t like in high school in the last 3 days
— ellie schnitt (@holy_schnitt) July 3, 2019
6. The most accurate depiction ever.
going to your hometown Walmart and avoiding the locals pic.twitter.com/FXOXMOSCsF
— Kate (@stanleyk13) December 28, 2018
5. That was a close one.
me at the grocery store after successfully avoiding someone I went to high school with pic.twitter.com/nKOfx6Wrwt
— Mason Levi (@iAmMasonLevi) March 29, 2018
4. And yet you’re still never fully prepared.
when I go to the grocery store in my hometown and see seven people I know https://t.co/ePSQt1vJhu
— Betches (@betchesluvthis) October 25, 2019
3. Can’t we just come to a mutual agreement?
Seeing people I went to high school w is SCARY I’m just like “pls don’t talk to me pls don’t talk to me pls don’t talk to m”
— mean irene (@ireenee_b) September 7, 2018
2. I think it must take years to hone.
Avoiding people at your hometown Wal-Mart is a very important skill in life
— Gavin Hall (@gavinhall_12) December 18, 2016
1. A million dollar idea.
an app with grindr’s distance-in-feet location technology but just so you can avoid running into people you went to high school with when you visit your hometown
— lesbian mothman (@verysmallriver) May 23, 2019
I’m so not looking forward to the next time this happens to me.
How do you handle this? Do you hide in the bread aisle? Put on a fake smile and start coming up with an excuse to stop talking before you start? Share you tricks with us in the comments!