We’ve been told the same thing over and over ever since our earliest school days: “There’s no such thing as a stupid question!”
Wellllllll, it’s not completely true. People ask really stupid questions all the time. Have you ever been on the internet? Here are some real classics that AskReddit users were nice enough to share.
1. Move the sun, please
“I work in a toll booth and was working on the westbound side. A lady drove up to my booth really mad, which is par for the course but I digress. She told me that every day she takes this route home from work, and every. single. day. the sun is directly in her eyes… Well of course, shes driving westbound at 6 pm. When I mentioned this she brushed it off and asked “well can’t you change the direction of the road or at least put a cover over it?! I can’t be the only person who is bothered by this!” “
“I’m a whitewater raft guide.
One of my customers asked me why they put rocks in the river if they’re so dangerous.”
3. Yes. Yes, we do
“I am an identical twin and one time a girl asked me if we get each other confused.”
“I was at my cottage looking at the stars at night with a friend and she turned to me and asked: “are there countries in the sky?” I didn’t know what she meant so I asked her to explain and then she said: “Well, are there any countries in the world that are just kind of, in the sky?” I was so confused that I just sat there in silence but eventually she says “I mean, is there land on the earth in the sky where people live that are countries?” At that point I just gave up and said “no” and she replied “oh, okay” so reassuringly.”
5. Customer service
“For context, I work in a phone shop.
Customer: What is this? (Hands me his bill)
Me: This is your bill.
Customer: But I already paid it.
Me: Well then, don’t worry about it.
Customer: No, I mean I paid it last month.
Me: Oh, this is just your second bill then.
Customer: BUT I ALREADY PAID IT!
Me: Last month’s bill, yes. This is your next bill.
Customer: YOU MEAN THEY KEEP SENDING THESE EVERY MONTH?
Me: … yes … that’s what a phone contract is. You signed a contract for 2 years didn’t you?
Me: So you will get a bill each month for 2 years then.
Customer: WHAT A RIP OFF!!!
He legit thought he would only get a single $90 bill for his brand new iPhone over the entire 2 years of his contract…”
“My 21 year old sister once asked my entire family at dinner if Nuns don’t have sex where do they get more nuns. That takes the cake for me.”
7. Where’s the beef?
“Waited on a woman who asked me what kind of meat was in our beef taco salad.
Lady: what kind of meat is in your beef taco salad?
Me : Beef
L: what kind of beef?
Me: Beef, ground beef seasoned with taco seasoning.
L: No, I mean is it pork or chicken?
Me: Ma’am, it’s beef, it’s from a cow. It’s beef.”
8. Well, it took a long time
” “How did we build the mountains?” – my brothers fiance, while we drove through the Rockies.”
9. Sea level
“People visiting Alaska on a cruise would walk onto the dock– a dock portruding into the Pacific Ocean– then look up at the mountains and ask what elevation we were at.
1 foot, ma’am. You are standing on a dock which is at sea level.”
10. Hold the potatoes
“Someone was placing an order once at my family’s restaurant, and they had asked me for a side of French fries without the potatoes. I assumed she was joking, so I laughed…she wasn’t joking. She got offended and left the restaurant lol.”
“If it was possible to even land a plane on Japan because it’s so small.
Because, you know, maps are a 1:1 description of the world.”
12. The doctor will be right with you
“I’m a postpartum nurse. A patient asked me “when will the doctor be here to pierce my nipples so I can breastfeed?” “
13. Spelling problems
“I worked in a pizza restaurant when I was 16. They had a pizza they called a UFO pizza. It was just another slab of dough on top of a regular pizza, and it made it look like an orb, hence the name.
One day a guy that worked there was writing down a telephone order, turns around and says “hey guys, how do you spell UFO??” The owner looked mortified and just repeated “youuu eefff ohhh!!”. He stared back in silence for a few moments before it hit him.”
14. Different moons
“Not me, but our safari guide in South Africa said he once heard a woman ask her husband, “Honey, is that the same moon we see in Texas?” “
15. Yes, ma’am
“Was a Mac Genius for 7 years, customer asked if her iPod would get heavier as she puts more music on it.”