The #metoo movement has changed America for the better. People are not afraid to come forward with their personal stories about sexual assault and harassment anymore. This doesn’t make them any easier to tell, but it reminds us that there are people willing to listen and offer support.
This also includes men. In this AskReddit thread, men share their painful #metoo stories.
1. Makes me sick
“I was raped on and off from ages 8-11 by a family member. When I finally told, they cut ties with him but my family blocked me from pressing legal charges. He became a cop and now is in charge of keeping people safe, and that makes me sick.”
2. Too scared
“Was at the beach when an older man grabbed my ass. I told him to stop and he grabbed my crotch. I pushed him away. I was too scared to call the police. I blamed myself for a while.”
“i was raped in college. went to popular college bar, alone, because my friends had all graduated. an older woman, 40s probably, sat down next to me and started chatting. i don’t know if she drugged me or i blacked out. i woke up at first light nude in a strange house. she got up to shower or something, i jumped up, found my stuff in a corner in the room, and bailed. i found my way to the main road and realized i was 10 miles from the town i lived in. head pounding, it was a long walk. i filed a police report and they took me seriously enough to do the report but said that because i couldn’t provide a name or remember exactly what home there wasn’t much they could do.”
“Drunken girl on a cruise ship grabbed my balls and squeezed so hard I fell to the floor in pain. As I got up, I asked why she did that, the answer was “you don’t deserve to have kids.” “
“This happened like three months ago. I was on vacation with friends and was super drunk/high. They wouldn’t let me into bars I was so fucked up.
I was sleeping back at an Airbnb we were renting and my gay friend came in and asked to sleep in the bed with me, (Not enough beds, had air mattresses) I said it was okay. He was a friend, ya know?
We went to sleep and I woke up to him rubbing his ass on my dick to get it hard. I turned away from him and he then asked to suck me off as he ripped open my button fly jeans and yanked them down. I remember saying “no, no, no-” but I was like petrified and just laid there. I stared at the ceiling for a while as it happened then I stopped it and turned over away from him.
What made it worse was I feel like he was psychologically playing with me the rest of the vacation. Like he took my room and I slept on the couch, he’d make comments and be a dick to me. And I feel bad not telling anyone afterwards (or kicking his ass out of the Airbnb when it happened) cause he could have done the same thing to my other friends.”
“When I was 19 I was sexually harassed and groped by my 23 year old manager when I was working at a lottery kiosk. I was bent over moving stuff around under the counter when she walked up behind me, told me she had a dream about us having sex the night before and then grabbed my ass.
I froze, she laughed and went back to her desk. I didn’t know what to do or say so I just went on with my day.”
7. Deep sleep
“Was at a friends house for the weekend, his sister shows up and we kind of clicked. After a night of heavy drinking she asked me to sleep in her bed with her, I remember making out with her and then falling asleep. I woke up completely naked and asked her how that happened and she said she felt that I was still hard after dozing off so she just took it upon herself to have sex w me even though I was asleep (or at least half asleep, I’m known as a very deep sleeper, especially when drunk). At that point I had never had sex with anyone without a condom, so you can imagine my excitement when I found out that there wasn’t one used with this girl that I had met for the first time.
And what’s worse was I ended working with her briefly like a year or so after and she decided to tell all the other girls I worked with that we had sex, which then basically made them want nothing to do with me.”
“Was a bouncer growing up. Every single night my junk would get grabbed. Occasionally would have a girl try and work the zipper down on my pants. Piles of unwarranted kisses. Contrary to popular belief I wasn’t thrilled, had a solid gf at the time, and found it scummy.”
“14 years old at a resort. Was out late with some guys I’d met. Coming home in this dark corridor, some old guy jumps out of nowhere, pins me against a wall and sticks his tongue in my face licking me and trying to work my pants down. I shoved my knee into his crotch and ran. It left me traumatized for months about meeting new people.”
10. I have a girlfriend
“Was going out with some friends from work, went out early and had to wait for them. Sat down at a table with 1 guy and 2 women and we started talking after around 20-30 minutes the guy and 1 of the women excused themselves and left. So i was sitting there with this woman and she was sending very clear signals, like overtly sexual.
Told her i had a girlfriend, she just started screaming that i had put something in her drink. I got thrown out she got to stay, i had to talk with the police, got banned from that place on top of it. They never bothered looking into if anyone had put anything in her drink either. It was just assumed that i was guilty.”
11. Walkin’ home
“Went out with a girl and she drove us. She told me either I go inside her apartment and let her blow me or I walk home.
It was like 10 degrees F and I wasnt dressed for it and I was about 10 miles from home.
So I walked.”
12. She does that
“I went on a camping trip during college and was raped by a girl. I woke up as she was blowing me and I realized what was going on as she was about to mount me, so I threw her off, puked and kicked her out of my tent. We had no communication prior to this. When I told others about it, all I got was a laugh and “Yeahhh, she does that”. Went to campus police and was “highly recommended” that I drop it as they laughed about it. I didn’t want to be made fun of as the guy who was raped by a girl and all the jokes that would come with it.”
13. Crossed the line
“One of my girlfriend’s gay friends was fucked up on something and tried to kiss me. I backed away kind of chuckling and he grabbed the back of my neck, duck his nails in and pulled my head towards his face. I was able to push him off of me but a boundry had been crossed that messed with me for a while.
Never really told anyone because I didn’t want anyone to think I was homophobic.”
14. Business trip
“This was about 18 years ago. I was on a business trip with a woman who I was not at all attracted to, physically or personality wise. I was 24 she was probably 29-31. She invited me to go get dinner after work, I agreed, she seemed normal enough to just chit-chat with. She said to stop by her hotel room when I was ready. When I got there she invited me into her room before we headed out. She had a bottle wine open and asked if I wanted a glass. I didn’t think there was much harm in it so sure, why not.
We walked to a Red Robin a few blocks away for dinner. I had 2 beers with my burger while we just made small talk. After dinner we decided to go see a movie. Nothing really exceptional. I can’t even remember what it was. I also don’t remember walking back to the hotel. What I do remember is gaining consciousness with her on top of me then nothing else until I woke up in the morning naked in her bed. I got dressed and high-tailed it back to my room and took the longest shower of my life. I assume I was roofied since I know I only had 3 drinks which, even though I’ve been blackout drunk in the past it took a lot more than 3 drinks over 4 hours to get that way. I’ve only ever told my wife about it and that’s about it besides this.”
15. With force
“I now realize I had this kind of experience when I was younger with a girl from high school. She wanted to have sex with me and was the fiancée of a friend of mine at the time. I told her I didn’t want anything like that with her and she forcibly groped me multiple times when we were alone and forcibly kissed me one time as well.”
16. The bathroom
“I remember being around 2 or 3 years old when this happened. My parents had our next door neighbor babysit me often. She was a teenager. I can remember one time she was in the bathroom and she called me into the bathroom. She was sat on the toilet, legs spread. I tried looking away cause I thought it was gross but she grabbed my arm and forced me to look at her vagina. Then she slapped me. I ran away but then she yelled at me to come back. I did and she told me to look again. Again, I didn’t want to but she told me she would slap me again if I didn’t look. Not wanting to get hit again, I looked. Obviously she slapped me anyway. I don’t remember much after that.
She eventually got fired cause my mom caught her stealing makeup. I told my parents she would hit me, but I never told them the context above. I’ve never told anyone before this really. I’m 30 years old and I’m pretty sure it still affects me. I don’t like looking at women’s genitals and frankly feel embarrassed to look at any women who are disrobed. I’ve honestly never had a girlfriend before, and the idea of intimacy with a woman just doesn’t sit right with me. I’m sure I want a family someday, but I don’t have any drive to pursue it, and when I think to myself why I feel this way, my thoughts inevitably drift back to that day in the bathroom.”
“I was at a bar the other night and had a girl walk over to me and grab my crotch (She was a stranger who I had never talked to or even made eye contact with) then she told me “You just look like you have a really big dick.” I just turned and walked away thinking she was hammered and confused me with somebody else.
Then she walked over again with some guy and told me that it was her boyfriend and he saw her grab my crotch. Her boyfriend then spread his arms and asked “what was my fucking problem?” and gave me a small shove. My best friend grabbed me and pulled me away and we left. I basically got groped by a stranger and then some guy wanted to fight me because of it… I’m still angry and confused by it.”
18. Not OK
“I was working as a bus boy at a restaurant and a drunk old lady suddenly grabbed my junk in a death grip for what felt like an eternity.”
“A friend of mine in high school (16 year old boy) got targeted by a younger teacher (late 20s woman). She would try to keep him after class, rub his shoulders, drape her arm around him when she was talking to him. Stuff like that. It made him very uncomfortable, but all the guys in class kept telling him how he should consider himself lucky because she’s a good looking woman.
This soon escalated to her insisting he “return the favor” in order to keep his grades up. Like we’d compare notes and he’d see his paper was marked wrong, and she’d say something like, “I guess I was so upset that you didn’t want a hug this morning I must have graded it wrong.” So he started giving in to the pressure because he was afraid for his grades.
Everyone kept telling him how he should feel lucky, so he eventually stopped complaining. She was eventually caught giving him a BJ at school, and she got fired. Even when everyone knew the whole story, I even remember some teachers talking about how that was what most high school guys dreamed of. It was sick.”
“Girl at the bar i was dancing with kept sticking her hand down my pants. Kept telling her to stop, she called me a pussy. Walked away and left with my friends, felt kind of violated. Not a huge deal but i’ve been fortunate in life so far no other examples.”