Jessicas – no matter how you spell your name – your time is now.
Let’s take a look.
1. All of them…
girls who will absolutely ruin your life:
-girls with a septum piercing
-girls that wear chunky filas
-girls that don’t wear bras to class
-girls named Jessica that divorced me and took the kids and won’t even let me see them on Christmas
-girls that work at spencer’s
— Beans After Dark (@goodbeanalt) August 22, 2019
2. Ouch! That one burns.
what's your sleep style? like for instance I sleep like a starfish and my ex slept with a girl named Jessica
— clammy (@GawdOffalTweets) November 25, 2019
3. It’s just so true
We all know a girl with a fake Michael kors bag named Jessica
— miri (@WeAllKnowA) November 14, 2015
4. Hmmm. Think about that…
Why do all girls named Jessica like horses
— mikey (@notmikeydavis) March 20, 2017
5. You can’t trust them.
I can't wait to have kids so I can teach them lessons like how you shouldn't pee into the wind and not to trust girls named Jess or Alexis
— Luke Lyman (@blameprometheus) March 30, 2015
6. This is very accurate.
all cocker spaniels look like girls named jessica don’t ask me why that’s just the way it is
— madison (@madisutton) January 20, 2018
7. I’ve witnessed this personally.
Girls named Jessica definitely know how to fight
— Notorious KGB ???????? (@kgb_notorious) January 8, 2019
8. Looking for his soulmate.
just shotgunned a beer while wearing a ZTA shirt do any girls named jessica wanna go out with me
— Blake (@BlakeHunter_) July 8, 2019
9. That is not cool.
I just saw the name Jessica spelled like "Gesika," so I think I'm done with humans now. It's been real.
— krispy (@KrispyTacoBelle) June 21, 2018
10. Isn’t that cute?
girl who won’t stop loudly sipping the melted ice in her starbucks drink that she finished an hour ago: my name is jessica but my boyfriend calls me a brat????????????
— a (@brokeangeI) February 27, 2019
11. Might be time to change your name.
if my name was Jessica my only pickup line would be "say yes to the Jess"
— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) February 26, 2014
12. Jessica wrote that!
y’all fall for this crap every year. and every year professional astrologers tell y’all to not believe this, but you still let a news article written by some girl named jessica who only knows her sun sign cause an ex boyfriend who’s ~spiritual~ asked her one night https://t.co/9MhUVCqOHw
— thomas (@ThomasBeautyy) October 2, 2019
13. Any takers on this one?
$10 to any the 1975 stan who’s name isn’t holly, olivia, mia, ava, sophie, jessica, emily or abigail
— liz (@NOACFLIZ) June 29, 2019
14. Let’s hit Daytona Beach!
Spring Break Essentials:
-1 ghost named "Jason"
-a boy named Brenda
— audrey farnsworth (@audipenny) April 2, 2015
15. Mom, let’s have a talk.
when i asked my mom why she never gave me an american/european name she said "white ppl names dont mean anything. so many white men named rich. but are they rich? they are rich in nothing. they are miserable" and thats why im bao and not like, jessica
— Art Nouveau w/ Brutalist Characteristics (@numetaldreamgrl) May 3, 2019
Wow, some of those are pretty harsh!
What do you think? Have you had some bad experiences with Jessicas in your life?
Let us know what you think in the comments…and you’re one of the good Jessicas out there, we apologize…