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My grandfather knows absolutely everything there is to know about cars.

My dad, in turn, knows an awful lot about cars, but certainly not everything.

I, for my part, know absolutely nothing about cars.

Following this pattern, if I ever have a son I should expect that it will loop back around and he will know everything about them and be able to help me when the weird noises happen.

But not knowing anything about normal cars, you can imagine my horror and confusion upon seeing these things out on the street. What are they? What do they want with me? Why do they exist?

15. Limo…tractor?

I could stare at this for a thousand lifetimes and come no closer to enlightenment.

Via: The Chive

14. It’s an antique

Well there’s your problem right there.

Via: The Chive

13. Totally exhausted

I expect this thing to star blasting out Phantom of the Opera on the road.

Via: The Chive

12. Muppet car

Fozzy, is that you? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY BOY?

Via: The Chive

11. Big guy

It’s kind of…cute?

Via: The Chive

10. Neon machine

Why does this look like a prize from a Nickelodeon show?

Via: The Chive

9. In tow

It’s a full blown caravan.

Via: The Chive

8. Spotted in the wild

This is straight out of an early 2000’s romcom.

Via: The Chive

7. Shamu

He’s finally free!

Via: The Chive

6. This bugs me

How are you gonna take a cop seriously when they pull you over in this.

Via: The Chive

5. Plaid and proud

Somebody forgot to unwrap their present.

Via: The Chive

4. Armed and dangerous

Now that’s what I call a muscle car.

Via: The Chive

3. Low rider

Well…low, anyway.

Via: The Chive

2. Can we do it?

Yes, but we shouldn’t.

Via: The Chive

1. Spoiler alert

Is that like…a solar panel or something?

Via: The Chive

I’ve never understood cars or car people less than I do in this moment.

If you could make any modification to your car, what would it be?

Tell us in the comments.


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