As a food lover and enthusiastic home cook, I always try to have as many cookbooks as I can get my hands on. It’s a great way to learn interesting new recipes and techniques, as well as a source of culinary inspiration.
Still, of all the cookbooks I’ve ever read, this one shared by Twitter user Jordan Adams may just take the cake. Adams shared some of the recipes from his nephew Ethan’s pre-kindergarten class that the kiddos dictated themselves, and they are glorious.
Take a look.
My nephews Ethan’s pre-k class made a cook book, and all the kids had to come up with all the recipes😂😂 so much better than I could’ve imagined. pic.twitter.com/X5d0Sqzw5N
— Jordan Adams (@JordanKAdams97) May 16, 2018
Ethan’s Eggs can be made for a mere $3, they only take 2 seconds, and you can buy all the ingredients at Texas Roadhouse. Ethan also spelled out the exact instructions for his cuisine:
“First you put pancakes and then sugar and that’s it. You can cook it, but you can go to my house and I will give you eggs because my mom makes eggs all the time. You can eat them with a spoon. Don’t put anything on them because that’s how you makes eggs, with nothing.”
Joe’s Tacos are also a culinary treat. Follow along closely:
“First I don’t actually know, I really don’t remember anything. Can I change this to cheesy roll ups? Because they are super easy. There is only 3 stuff you need, white cheese, yellow cheese, and tortilla. I don’t even want to make tacos anymore. I don’t even know how. It is so hard to think about tacos. But I can make cheesy roll ups. They are super easy. They come from Taco Bell. I need yellow cheese and I don’t know where to buy the white cheese. I don’t know how to make tacos. Cheesy rollups are better because I know how to make them. I don’t think…one time I made candy and it turned brown. I don’t want tacos anymore. I like them, but I love cheesy rollups more. I don’t like beans because they make me throw up. My mom made me a burrito one time with beans and I threw up. Wait…I know how to make watermelon it is easy…just buy the watermelon and eat it.”
Joe is obviously a true master chef. And what about Ariana’s Macaroni?
“First you put the macaroni in the stove and now you put it in the end. Put it to the oven and put cheese and more melted cheese. The oven has to be hot like fire…like a candle…like for birthdays. Now you need to tell everyone that its time to leave. And I have to leave because I am going to a party with a swimming pool. My sister says, “Why do you go to the swimming pool?” and I say, “Because I like it.” Now I go home and I am waiting for it to not be hot and then my sister says, “Why do you do that?” It’s because you blow on the macaroni so it won’t be hot. You need to wait. Now it’s done!”
And as you saw in the tweet earlier, Sebastian’s pancakes consist of only salt and cost $70. The kid knows his stuff.
“You get a thingy from the house and you put it in the hot thingy. Turn on the hot thingy and it burns so you have to be careful. You make like, something and put it in and it cooks. Then you get a plate and finish it. Don’t leave the plate on the table, you have to throw it away in the wink or flies will get on it.”
People on Twitter thought the whole thing was totally hilarious.
The Teachers out here really just writing down the children's pure stream of consciousness
— joonæt (@joonaet) May 18, 2018
joe is so stressed out. it's ok joe, you don't have to make the tacos
— 99 Ricki Lake (@cataxista) May 19, 2018
Where can I buy this cookbook? 😂😂 I think I want to make joes tacos they sound good 😂😂
— Roryyyyyyyyyyy 🥴 (@_rory19) May 18, 2018
I hear Ariana's Macaroni in a rather serious adult voice, at a poetry reading. It gets a standing ovation, the audience moved to tears.
— Jon South (@phlebasjon) May 18, 2018
"The oven has to be hot like fire." Oh my God, I needed this laugh today. Thank you!
— Sheila O'Malley (@sheilakathleen) May 19, 2018
“Salt and that’s it “
— bri 🦋 (@briannanoel24) May 19, 2018
I just whipped up some of Sebastian’s pancakes, absolutely amazing; a true culinary prodigy 👌🏽😫 pic.twitter.com/UqH0yxDok4
— Andre Gante (@andr__gant_) May 21, 2018
I can’t wait to make Joe’s tacos!