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People Break Down The Dumbest Traditions They’ve Ever Witnessed

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Traditions have a way of connecting us to our past.

We learn them from our parents, our grandparents or even an understanding of our cultural background.

And it can be comforting to carry out many of these traditions. They give us a sense of long-term regularity amidst all the chaos of current events and people coming and going in our lives.

But for all that comfort, there are a whole lot of head-scraching moments.

These are the times we wonder:

“How and why did this get started and why the hell are we still doing it?”

One Redditor asked:

“What is the dumbest tradition?”

Of course wedding traditions came up a lot—these come out of Lebanon.

“So we have this tradition in some parts of Lebanon. Once you have your wedding, the bride’s male relatives are supposed to ‘kidnap’ the groom. The bride should go back to her parent’s for 2 nights a night after the wedding.”

“when the priest/shiek asks the bride.. do you take this man as your husband.. the bride should refuse to answer the question twice .. she should answer yes at the 3rd time. As a sign of showing that she’s not desperate to marry the groom.” — Ghost_Leb

But as we know, Lebanon isn’t the only place with bizarre wedding moments. 

“Garter and Bouquet tosses at Weddings.”

“Hate ‘em, always have. Think they’re outdated and I’m so thrilled most of my clients (I’m in the wedding industry) are steering away from them.”

“Seriously, who wants to have their husband go up their skirt in front of their parents?”

“[to be fair]; a decent amount of my clients are older” — caitycc

Then came talk of the clothes.

“White wedding dresses.White is the most unflattering color,makes you look 50lbs heavier and doesn’t outline your body at all.”

“The ONE day it’s about you and your S.O and ur not even gonna pick ur favorite color dress? LAME I’m wearing a black and peach pink dress to my wedding🙃” — chocolatecakeslicee

One person was more involved with the lead-up to marriage.

“That the man has to propose.”

“When I want to get married I will ask him.”

“Also to add asking the parents for approval. We are all adults, we don’t need your permission to get married” — MinnesotoanPerson

This comment took aim at the whole universe of wedding traditions.

“I got married a few years back and I can tell you that at least 75% of wedding traditions are stupid and should be abolished.”

“If you’re getting married and there’s something you’re “supposed to do” that you just don’t care about, seriously, skip it. You will still have plenty to do and honestly you’ll barely remember the day once it’s done anyway.”

“It all goes by so fast, it’s insane. Ignore everyone else, skip the things that you think are dumb, and just enjoy your day. Absolutely no one will remember if you did that cringey garter dance or threw your bouquet.”

“Traditions are just peer pressure from dead people.” — KitchenSwillForPigs

And then there are the things people do far after the wedding. 

” ‘Staying together for the kids’ “

“Not 100% sure this counts/is a tradition but it sure feels like one with how often people do it.”

“Like dude, just admit your marriage/relationship is failing, be adults about it, and separate instead of pretending you’re doing it for a good reason. As an adult who’s parents did this, I can PROMISE you you’re only hurting your kids and yourselves by doing this.” — SaphireJames

Moving on from weddings, this person was thinking more about daily life. 

“The false kindness rules. I’m talking about the ones that make you refuse a gift, expecting it to be offered to you once more, and other kinds of such rules.”

“The thing is such rules are usually very local, often limited to a particular village, and conflict with the rules of different areas.”

“Imagine that in your area, being offered a gift means being respected highly, and it is rude to reject a gift. While in some other area, being offered a gift means you are supposed to refuse twice and only accept if the offer is repeated for the third time.”

“The result? You meet someone. She offers you a gift. You don’t really like chocolate, but you accept because you don’t want to sound rude. Then she makes a weird face, as if you stole it from her.”

“And she doesn’t seem to be into you, but keeps offering you coffee and dinner, and pretends that the date was successful, only to block you on tinder afterwards.” — King_Dagda

This commenter was thinking politically.

“The dumbest tradition we (Brits) have is having a monarchy. Giving people who serve no purpose prestige, respect and wealth based solely on their bloodline is ridiculous.”

“It’s a perpetuation of the idea that some genes are superior to others and have more worth.” — Negative-Net-9455

This one is just bizarre. 

“Up until he died (although someone else is probably carrying on the tradition), a Canadian weekly agriculture newspaper used to publish the annual findings of a guy who forecasted the weather by reading the entrails (spleen) of a slaughtered pig.” — tangcameo

As is this one. 

“Tar barrel running in Ottery St Mary, England.”

“Yes you are correct, hot tar coming out of a barrel being ran down a street with spectators watching.”

“Even listed as an attraction! Come down to South Devon and get yourself burnt! Fun times 😂” — Baconator08

And this one too. 

“In Russia,there’s a tradition among cosmonauts when they go out to the launch pad. The bus they ride on stops half way so the cosmonauts can get out and piss on the tires.” — TeamNathanFTW

We end with a timely example.

“Said this before, but the thing about having your scared/crying child take a picture with dept. store Santa then sending it out as your x-mas card/e-card. How is that at all cute?”

“If they are happy and all, fine. But not if they are clearly in terror.” — John32070

With your help, all these strange behaviors can be phased out for good.

But of course, there’s always someone that seems to still be into it.

Written by Eric Spring

Eric Spring lives in New York City. He has poor vision and cooks a good egg. Most of his money is spent on live music and produce. He usually wears plain, solid color sweatshirts without hoods because he assumes loud patterns make people expect something big. Typically, he'll bypass a handshake and go straight for the hug.