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Flight Attendants Break Down Their Absolute Craziest Experiences On The Job

Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash

What is it about flying that brings out the absolute worst in people?

Take a quick glance at the last year and you’ll see a rise in assaults on the people trying to make your flying experience more pleasurable.

Perhaps it’s the nerves piling up before the passenger gets on board? Or it could be the idea, “I’m paying for this so I can do whatever I want.”

Whatever the reason, if you make a fool of yourself on a flight, they’ll make a fool out of you online.

Reddit user, THESILENTPRINCESS06, wanted to hear some horror stories from the skies when they asked:

“Flight Attendents, What Are Some Of Your Craziest Stories?”

No One Is Getting Food On This Flight

“I did a flight on New Year’s Day a fair few years ago. A older gentleman pass out and his wife thought he had died. The other crew all went to assist and there was a doctor onboard luckily. We had to stop the food service while the gentleman was stabilised which took ages.”

“Once he was stable we tried the food service again. However just as we were getting the trolly from the back galley a woman dramatically collapsed in front of it so we had to deal with her. We get her stable and back in her seat and then go for the trolly only for her to come back and collapse again in front of the trolly. It was news years day so this woman had partied too hard the night before and was why she felt sick.”

“A crew member from the front comes down and says they had to stop the food service as well because a kid had thrown up all over the front galley and the toilet. We also had a parent who kept letting their child press the call bell for fun. I had to explain twice that it was not a toy and to stop lifting your child up to press the button. The paramedics came and the guy was taken to hospital but not before his wife said that the same thing happened on their flight out. Moral of this story is don’t fly if you are very unwell and don’t fly hungover.” ~ posh-old-bird

Enjoy Your Pickles

“I was on a flight from Seoul to Jeju Island in Korea. Jeju Island is a very, very popular honeymoon destination for Koreans in the mainland. Most of the attractions are geared towards couples.”

“Some poor guy had brought a huge jar of pickled eggs wrapped (he thought) carefully. Maybe he needed to bring some of mama’s home cooked food with him?”

“As we took off and began the ascent, liquid started dripping down on the festively dressed passengers. It started in the overhead compartment in the 3rd row and dripped in everyone’s hair and shoulders. All the way back to the last row in the little plane.”

“Lots of little shrieks, then immediately angry voices. The sharp smell of pickle juice (not US style), permeated the plane.”

“An annoyed flight attendant dashed over, reached deep in to the overhead compartment, and removed a very wet, still dripping bag.”

“We could hear the broken glass pieces moving against each other. She stalked off with it, back stiff with disapproval.”

“The very, very red-faced man under the compartment stood up and faced the passengers behind him. He made an apologetic speech and bowed frequently during it.”

“I don’t speak Korean, so I don’t know what the passengers replied specifically, but it was not a great way to start a honeymoon for all the couples onboard.”

“I hope it became a funny story to tell back home later.” ~ meowhahaha

They’re Here To Help?

“The nicest flight attendant I ever had was the one that put in my grandpa’s eyedrops so my grandma didn’t have to. thank you, JetBlue!” ~ superdude311

Fun To See Board

“You come on the plane rocking your Gucci belt, Houston Street-worthy Louis Vuitton duffle, torn True Religions, a killer fade and a swagger that could make a woman’s ovaries cry… and then you take your seat in 22B and play Candy Crush on a cracked screen.”

“I’ve been a flight attendant for almost 12 years and this is a common occurrence.” ~ MSotallyTober

Everyone Making Bad Decisions In This One

“I had a punch-up kick off on a 767 over the Atlantic Ocean once whilst enroute from London Gatwick to Barbados. That was pretty fun to deal with as the only male steward.”

“The fight began following an argument after the woman broke her partner’s iPod. He wasnt happy about it so had a row which developed into a full blown punch-up. Turns out they had never met before until earlier that day when he saw her in London and asked if she wanted to come to the Caribbean on a free holiday (drug mule anyone).”

“They both began to behave once I told them that we will divert and the nearest diversion airport was in the USA, where they take that kind of sh-t seriously. Obviously had to keep them apart and we let the authorities deal with them once we’d landed in Barbados.”

“I’ve had a lot go on on my flights before and seen some sh-t before but that one makes me shake my head with a little chuckle too of course.” ~ Expo737

Don’t Wield It Like A Weapon. Don’t Be That Person.

“My best friends a flight attendant, so here’s the story From her perspective.”

“it was a pretty Normal flight. Most people were already sleeping, while the others were reading a book, but a women had her baby with her, and the baby was crying. not to big of a deal, if we didn’t have a Karen on the flight.”

“she called me over, as I was just about to go to the back, she said “ can you get that baby to stop crying“ ” sorry ma’am, it’s not under my control. I’m sure the mom in trying her hardest to keep the noise down.” She screamed “ I HAVE A MENTAL ILLNESS IF THAT BABY DOESNT SHUT UP ILL DO IT MYSELF!” everyone Stared at her.”

“But, she got up. And was walking with a red face to the baby. I went infront of the baby and mom, she pushed me back, but i held myself up with the two seats in between. By that point, another flight attendant came rushing in. “ ma’am I need you to calm down.“ “ FINE. BUT JUST TO LET YOU KNOW, I HAVE A MENTAL ILLNESS.” ~ IconicDarkness

Like In The Movies, But Sadder

“Cousin is a FA. Had a VERY pregnant woman who was en route to deliver at a different hospital in the last 2 weeks of her pregnancy. Unfortunately, her baby wasn’t waiting.”

“Halfway through the trip, she starts going into labor. They move first class back one row (wasn’t full) so they had room. Luckily, the flight had a shock trauma cardiothoracic surgeon and a Navy corpsman on board. She didn’t know she was having twins(thought they were obligated to tell you?).”

“One didn’t make it. I’m guessing that’s why she went intro labor.” ~ tidytibs

Wait, It’s Allowed…?

“Former flight attendant here.”

“Funniest story always is people who are joining the mile high club. You are absolutely allowed to have sex in a lavatory and we won’t stop you. People slinking out of the bathroom with sh-t eating grins and red faces was always hilarious.” ~ TJeffersonsBlackKid

“It’s allowed? Wait it’s ALLOWED?! you’re telling me this now?!” ~ Deedum78

“Family member used to be a flight attendant. The theory is as long as they’re quiet about it and not disturbing other passengers it’s better to let them screw rather than risk a potential confrontation in a steel tube with no escape.”

“Family member also told me the US to Australia flights had the most f-cking – apparently Aussie gals are wild.” ~ EastGlencoe

…And A Merry Christmas To You

“On Christmas Day we were working the last flight of the night and it was completely full. Every seat. There was a couple in the last row window and aisle seat. He proceeds to diddle her under their coats. We notice but don’t make an issue out of it. Well when she’s satisfied she proceeded to return the favor for him. Once again we notice but don’t want to make a big deal out of it.”

“When we land they were the very last two off the airplane and the grizzly senior lady I’m flying with calls out to them as they were about half way down the aisle. “Just so you know… that’s sh-t you pulled doesn’t put you in the mile high club… that doesn’t count. Merry Christmas.” They just turned beat red and scampered off the airplane as fast as they could. I looked at her like she was crazy, sure we were about to get fired.”

“She winked at me and said what are they going to do? write a letter to the company that we called them out for diddling each other on the airplane? We will be fine now come on kid let’s go get a Christmas cocktail.” ~ canthav814

Be safe up there in the skies.

A lot of misbehavior on board.

Written by Robert Acosta

Robert Acosta is an elementary school teacher with a specialty in language arts and writing. He taught for six years in both Tucson and Phoenix before starting his own private tutoring business to serve the greater metro Phoenix area. As a freelance writer his work appears on George Takei’s “Oh Myyy” properties and ÜberFacts.
He’s average at drawing, above-average at Magic the Gathering, and an expert at changing diapers in the front seat of cars. He resides in Phoenix with his wife, two black cats and twin sons.