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Lawyers Describe The Most Messed Up Court Cases They’ve Ever Seen

Photo by Tingey Injury Law Firm on Unsplash

Crime is the one thing we’d all prefer wouldn’t come in many varieties.

Unfortunately, a quick talk with any lawyer over drinks and you’ll hear of some of the worst parts of society they’ve had to defend. While some might venture into the weird, there are those criminal cases which fall under the “horrific” and “depressing” category of humanity, like the stories people shared below.

Reddit user, HolyMotherOfDragons, wanted the inside scoop when they asked:

“Lawyers of reddit, what is the most f-cked up case that you have fought or seen?”

Doesn’t Matter If You’re Dead Or Not

“Client insisted on suing an employee who failed to show up to work which caused a contract to be cancelled.”

“The employee didn’t show up to work because he died.” ~ alejandrosalamandro

Maybe Think About That Before Having Children

“Worse I’ve heard was a divorce case where both parties fought to NOT have the kids stay with them. It’s so depressive to think about the children in that case.” ~ maximef1

Sitting Next To Someone, Knowing What They Can Do…

“In a pro bono program, I was assigned to handle the request of an inmate to be released after serving 2/3rd of his sentence. When I read his file, I discovered that he was convicted for kidnapping a woman, tying her to the right front wheel of his jeep and torturing her to death with some sort of home made flamethrower.”

“When I went to see the guy, he denied everything, and told me he was appealing the verdict (which legally was not possible anymore).”

“It was really weird sitting in a room with this guy, knowing what he was convicted of, and knowing that he’d been denying the conviction for almost 20 years.”

“Needless to say, his request to be released early was denied.” ~ ExistenceisObsolete

Lack Of Follow Through

“A sociopath in a psych ward making suicide pacts with vulnerable people and never following through. Charged with murder, determined he was too out of his mind to be accountable.”

“Gonna be in an asylum for the next two decades unless something major changes within the case” ~ expressiii

A Practical Joke Gone Wrong

“Case told to me by another lawyer on one of my cases: two guys decided to give a marijuana laced brownie to their co-worker without telling him it had marijuana in it… right before he started his shift… as a crane operator.”

“It went predictably badly, resulted in an accident and even their union agreed the guys should be fired.” ~ tintedpink

Keeping It All In The Family

“I am not a lawyer, I work for one.”

“We represented a family who tried to ruin a teenage boy’s life. They fabricated police reports, falsely claimed he stole expensive electronics from them, and took their claims to the very uninterested school the boy attended.”

“When cops tried to investigate, the family evaded the investigator and lied to him.”

“Why do all this? The family’s son was crushing on a girl they were hosting in their home.”

“She chose to date the boy in question over the son. All three kids were classmates.”

“The boy got a hefty settlement from the family. This case was outside our typical areas of practice, but they came from a friend of the attorney.” ~ No-The-Other-Paige

Perhaps Learn A Little Latin?

“Took a pro bono divorce case. The husband tried to attack me in the parking lot claiming I was screwing his wife.”

“He said no lawyer works for free so she must be screwing me.” ~ Thom803

Leaving A List Of Posthumous Demands

“Not my case, but I was sat in chambers waiting to be heard when it came before the judge…”

“A reasonably successful businessman had died, leaving a will in which he left all his business assets to his wife, on the condition that she destroy everything. Inventory, parts, records, office equipment, all of it.”

“If she refused, everything was to be given to the Hemlock Society, an organization in the States somewhere that advocates for assisted suicide.”

“Shortly after making the will, he committed suicide, having arranged for his death to be video recorded and the recording to be emailed to his wife and kids automatically. The lawyer didn’t say what the method of suicide was, but did say that it was traumatic for all who received the video, unsurprisingly.”

“The lawyer sought, and received, a consent order to amend the will to delete the destruction condition. He had the agreement of the Hemlock Society, which wanted nothing to do with a donation under those conditions.” ~ YVRJon

A Little Levity Before The End

“I’m here to provide comedic relief!”

“My buddy is an attorney and was working on a case against some company that was dumping pollution in a large, local body of water that had a direct opening to the ocean.”

“He gets a letter from an incredibly concerned local dude. He wrote this LONG ASS LETTER begging my buddy’s team to do all they can to win the case against the polluting company for the sake of the…mermaids that were living in that local body of water.”

“He had seen them often guys. He had been trying to befriend them for quite a while now and was concerned for their well-being and for the possibility that they would move out to the ocean to find a cleaner home if the company kept dumping pollution into their area. I wish I could find that pic of part of the letter.”

“In case you are as concerned as he was, fear not! My buddy’s team won the case and that company is no longer dumping their waste in that body of water” ~ Raccoon_Army_Leader

You Take The Case. You Keep Working. That’s The Job.

“A woman was alone with her baby after her husband got deployed. This was not long after the baby was born. Then the baby passed away, and the body had some strange bruising. The mother insisted the baby crawled out of her sight and fell down the stairs. The case ultimately got reassigned from our office, and the mother was pissed.”

“She told the primary lawyer on the case that she had indeed killed the baby. She basically bragged about it, and she had zero remorse at all. Seeing the infant’s autopsy photos was absolutely horrific.” ~ Fat-Pat_813

“Was she convicted?” ~ jazzygyal

“Yes, she ultimately got a fair bit of time.” ~ Fat-Pat_813

While it can never be easy to be assigned cases like the ones above, you just hope those involved in the handling of the case, as well as the verdict, are level-headed, reasonable people.

You know?

The complete opposite of the individuals they represent.

Written by Robert Acosta

Robert Acosta is an elementary school teacher with a specialty in language arts and writing. He taught for six years in both Tucson and Phoenix before starting his own private tutoring business to serve the greater metro Phoenix area. As a freelance writer his work appears on George Takei’s “Oh Myyy” properties and ÜberFacts.
He’s average at drawing, above-average at Magic the Gathering, and an expert at changing diapers in the front seat of cars. He resides in Phoenix with his wife, two black cats and twin sons.