Everyone has at least one person who gets on their last nerve. Maybe they sit in the cubicle next to you at work, or perhaps their kid is in your kid’s class. We might not hate them enough to risk Azkaban, but if there was just a way to make sure their days would be a little more difficult, well…
These 15 people have curses ready and waiting should Hogwarts ever lift that ban about magicking Muggles.
#15. They didn’t quite wipe enough.
“Their ass will always feel like they didn’t quite wipe enough.”
#14. Never actually sneeze.
“They will always feel a sneeze coming on but never actually sneeze.”
#13. Still damp.
“Their clothes will forever come out of the dryer still damp.”
#12. Until they change.
“Whenever they finish peeing the last drop will always wet their underwear and stay wet until they change.”
#11. Stub their toe.
“Every time they go up the stairs, they stub their toe.”
#10. Any time you need either one.
“Driver’s license and debit card swap position any time you need either one.”
#9. Every time.
“every time they type the letter “e” the keyboard won’t respond the first few times they press it”
#8. Urge to pee.
“Every time they lie down to sleep, they get an instant urge to pee.”
#7. Only socks.
“They are more likely to step on a wet spot when wearing only socks.”
#6. Someone has lots of enemies.
“Your shoes will never stay tied.
You will always get the seat in front of the talker in the movie theater. And the one behind the texter with their screen brightness set to 100%.
Your hotel room will always be next to the ice machine or the elevator shaft.
Your shower setting will always be a touch too cold, or too hot, no matter how you adjust it.
Every pair of earbuds you buy will have the right bud go out the 4th time you use them.
Your car will make that noise. Except when other people are around. And never at the mechanic’s
No matter how carefully you shave, you will nick the same spot every time.”
#5. The moment you reach it.
“Every stoplight will turn red the moment you reach it.”
#4. 3 seconds off.
“Every single video you ever watch will always be 3 seconds off sync audio wise.”
#3. At all times.
“One clogged nostril at all times.”
#2. The hiccups.
“Every 100 blinks gives them the hiccups.”
#1. Not enough toilet paper.
“Anytime they go to poop, there’s not enough toilet paper for them to finish wiping.”
I’m stealing some of these. You?