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People Discuss When They Realized Their Short-Lived Marriages Were Doomed

©Unsplash,Marcos Paulo Prado

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If you’re married or have been married at some point, you know that it can be rough and it doesn’t always work out the way you thought it would.

And, unfortunately, some marriages end in divorce…quickly…

AskReddit users who were divorced or separated within a year share their stories about when they realized it wasn’t going to work out.

1. Good thing that is over.

“I knew a week after I got married when he slammed my head into the wall “because he saw me looking at a man” at an ice cream shop. I’m from the US, and got married in England.

This dude changed completely right after we got married. A couple of weeks later, I had to get out of there and come back to the US.”

2. Blindsided.

“I was blindsided by it. We lived together for a year about an hour from my hometown. We relocated, upon her request and desire, to my hometown prior to our marriage so that when we had kids, it’s best to be close to family. We had a house we loved, a dog we loved, jobs we both loved working in…or so I thought. Married in October.

She goes to visit her sister over the next Labor Day weekend and I can’t attend due to work. Comes back the Tuesday after Labor Day and tells me she’s living a lie and someone else’s dream and she needs a divorce. I had no idea.

Divorce finalized in January. She married some dude that her sister was friends with, and she met on that trip I was unable to attend, this September.

Life is wild, sometimes.”

3. Toxic isn’t good.

“I had been fooling around with this girl for awhile. I never wanted anything serious, and I KNEW that from the start. Then my mom was killed…I went into a deep depression and this girl was there for me. Her mom had died of cancer about a year earlier and I guess we really bonded over that.

It pushed us much further emotionally than we ever should’ve gone. We ended up doing a courthouse marriage. I knew within the month that I had fucked up. BUT I didn’t want to just give up and get divorced. Once the emotions of my moms death passed, I realized how toxic she really was.

She was an incredibly unstable person and ended up just taking me into an even deeper depression. We divorced about a year ago (after being married for about 10 months), and I was immediately much happier. Marriage shouldn’t be taken lightly, but people also shouldn’t force themselves to be in unhealthy relationships.

We all make mistakes. Don’t waste your life with someone that doesn’t deserve you.”

4. A completely different person.

“The day after we got married when he slapped me across the face (hard and completely out of the blue). No argument, no conversation leading up to it, nothing. He said it wasn’t that hard of a hit, he was just kidding around, and I was being overdramatic.

He had never gotten violent with me while dating, but as soon as we got married it was like a switch flipped and he was a COMPLETELY different person. It got worse very quickly, and I ended up filing for divorce 73 days after we got married.”

5. Lies.

“She went out for girls night and met a new friend named Nicole at a bar. Started texting her a lot, then going to hang out now and then. We had a baby at home and she kept trying to go hang out with this girl from another town over with no last name whom I was not allowed to meet.

HIS NAME WAS Wesley.”

6. That was quick.

“On our honeymoon.

We dated for 5 years but on the honeymoon we had a big argument over my liberal use of sunscreen. She refused to wear any because of ‘chemicals’ and I liberally use it due to my ginger skin. We seriously argued over this for a good hour and she refused to even go into the pool with me because of sunscreen chemicals.

After a scuba adventure with her she could hardly walk because she got so burnt on her legs whereas my skin didn’t change.

She then tried to convince me that it was all my fault because I didn’t force her to wear the sunscreen and that the honeymoon was ruined.

It was then I realized I picked the wrong person. After a few more psycho arguments (mad at me because of something in her dreams, mad because I didn’t remind her to bring an umbrella….)

I had to call it quits. I can’t stay with someone who constantly blames me for their own problems.

Luckily no kids and I got back everything I brought into the marriage.”

7. A little jealous…

“I knew it was over when she started a fight at my Brothers funeral because female attendees were giving me hugs as part of the condolences.”

8. My soccer teammate…

“Not a year, but about 18 months. She was constantly complaining she didn’t have friends after moving in with me. Joined a local soccer team, and she talked about one teammate nonstop for months. I had a bad feeling about it from the get go but she assured me they were “just friends” and “how dare I not trust her.”

Thought I was going crazy because my gut told me something wasn’t right but I was punishing myself for being a bad husband and not trusting my wife. Turned out it was all true, she had been fucking the teammate for months. Most likely fucked someone else during our engagement. Split amicably officially as of last week without any mess, thank god.”

9. Jesus, this is bad.

“Got married in late May, by August or September I found out from my dad that my husband (now ex) and my brother’s wife were sexting. She was also my bridesmaid at our wedding. She felt guilty and told my dad who had to tell me.

I forgave him like a dingus and about a year and a half later I found pictures of him sucking two different dicks in our house and also wearing quite a bit of my nice makeup. All of this AFTER we moved to Washington from Florida. It’s been wild. We’re obviously divorced now.”

10. Ugh! That’s awful.

“A couple of weeks into our marriage, the sex started to physically hurt. I went to my OB and after a test or two, she informed me I had contracted chlamydia. That’s when I knew.

Turns out, my newlywed husband had been banging his coworker for months.”

11. No, I’m not.

“The day after the wedding when he poked me in the chest and said “you’re going to do what I say whether you like it or not “. Ugh. Big mistake.”

12. Time to go.

“Not technically within a year but when I returned from my first deployment (10 months) I found out she had been sleeping with 3 of my “buddies”.

Told her to pack her shit and get the fuck out.”

13. Quite a story…

“Back in the early 1980’s, I spent 6 years in the US Navy. In 1986 I was recruited to go into the US Army through a program for technical and intelligence experienced military personnel to become Warrant Officers. All the Navy offered me was sea duty and more sea duty. It looked like a real good deal.

I was engaged to a young lady three years my junior and had a bit more than $20,000 in savings. Everything looked promising with a new career and family life. The wedding went off without a hitch. I was looking at a vacation of about 3 months between exiting the Navy and entering training for the Army.

It was when my recruiter contacted me over my security clearance that things went south. My credit report did not match my questionnaire. There was three credit cards with a $14,000 balance I didn’t mention. It was no big deal, they weren’t delinquent, but I needed to amend my answers to account for them.

Turns out my wife had opened up a charge card at our bank, then got a couple of store cards around town. She had purchased some serious clothes and jewelry, but the real kicker was she had bought a horse. She had taken lessons as a child and decided this was going to be her new thing.

There was the price of the animal, riding gear, saddle and tack, vet bills, stable fees, yadda yadda yadda. I ended up dumping a big chunk of my savings into paying down these cards, then amending my questionnaire responses.

She was from a very blue collar family. They were very good people who worked hard for everything they had. But I don’t think, credit ratings and compounded interest rates were much discussed at the dinner table.

So I explained about credit cards, the huge interest rate, how long it would take to pay one down, then about security clearances and having a huge debt with no job would affect it.

I treated this all as a bump in our relationship, but thing got dark really fast. My ship date was coming up and things had to be done before I started training.

I was in good physical shape, but I was facing Boot camp, AIT, Airborne school, ranger school, warrant officer selection and advance training… basically 18 months of utter insanity. I was prepared for what I faced, but there was a lot that could go wrong. If I got through it, I was a Warrant Officer.

But if I dropped the ball along the way, I would not only be enlisted, but junior enlisted in a job they would decide for me. In theory, I could end up a line cook in some chow hall at Camp NoWhere.

About a week later, the phone rings. It’s about the horse. No one was taking care of the animal or cleaning the stable, or even feeding the poor thing. The stable had covered down for the sake of the animal, but now were charging $350 a week for the extra services my wife was supposed to be doing.

She was leaving our apartment every day, and I assumed it was for riding and care of the animal, and for the first week she was. The second week, she was lawyer shopping. She wanted out. She must have gotten wind of what happened at the stable and didn’t come home that night. The next day I got served with papers.

Total marriage time; 47 days.

So I ended up with an apartment with four months on the lease, no car and a horse. I found a new home for the horse. I had to defer my ship date and it took 14 months to settle the divorce. My security clearance was approved two days after the papers were filed. I shipped the next day.

In the end, I had two pair of pants, three shirts and a pair of shoe that had no business on anyones feet. I was working 2 minimum wage jobs, 14 hours a day, paying down debt, lawyers fees, rent and sometimes eating to get by.

I ended up at Fort Sill, Oklahoma mowing lawns for two months as I shipped without a training slot for boot camp. I wasn’t happy, but I was relieved.

In Airborne school, I met a ROTC cadet who was going to Airborne school over her summer break. She had a year to go before her commission and we hit it off. We’d get together on holidays, between training, long weekends.

When I finished training and got my warrant, still a cadet, she flew across the country to give me my first salute. I gave her a silver dollar as per tradition. Two months later, she received her commission, to which I saluted her, and returned the silver dollar. Married that Christmas.

We’ve been together 31 years.”

14. A story about Dad.

“Not me but my dad. He got remarried after being divorced for about 5 years. I would have been all for it, but he met this woman in another state on a business trip, and would travel up to see her every weekend after they hit if off. They knew each other for 6 months before getting engaged.

The engagement was only for 3 months. My brother and I tried telling him about all the red flags, telling him to take his time. My dad is very well-off financially, and we kept trying to earn him things were moving too quickly, that she was only in it for the money.

She moved her whole family from their home town to the city my dad lived in, including their elderly grandmother who needed constant medical supervision. Before they were even married, the pantry was full of Whole Foods brand food instead of the local grocery store, as was tradition. All new furniture, and had the house repainted, all at his bride-to-be’s request.

The marriage lasted all of 2 weeks. Apparently my dad’s new bride had the gall to ask my dad to leave everything to her in the will, and write me and my brother out. Only then did he realize she was in it for the money. The next day he had the marriage annulled.

Someday I would like to know what it’s like to fall so completely for someone that I don’t recognize they are taking advantage of me. Must feel good for that instant before it all comes crashing down.”

It’s always sad to hear about relationships breaking up…

Were you ever in a short marriage? What happened and why did you split up?

Please share your stories in the comments. We’d love to hear from you.